“Therapy” with Z


Zahra Rayani, Staff Reporter

High school is a hard time in life to go through, with the mental health issues to gossip, and let’s not forget about COVID 19 throwing everyone off. I decided to reach out to some students to see what their biggest struggles were. One of the struggles is knowing whether you’re in a toxic relationship or not. Let’s start off with getting to know what a toxic relationship is and what it consists of. The breakdown of a toxic relationship is when a couple doesn’t support each other, they have conflict, and they treat the relationship like a competition. Of course relationships go through ups and downs once in a while, but it’s totally different when it’s consistent and you feel as if it’s draining and the negative over takes the positive. One way or another, the person who makes the relationship toxic has either been taught by their family being toxic, or being in a past toxic relationship. They could have also experienced trauma. What are the signs and toxic traits? One major sign would be abuse, violence, or harassment. This doesn’t necessarily just mean physically, this can also be done mentally. The first, and simplest, is persistent unhappiness. If a relationship stops bringing joy, and instead consistently makes you feel sad, angry, anxious or “resigned, like you’ve sold out,” it may be toxic. You may also find yourself envious of happy couples. One big one that I’ve witnessed is watching how you feel on how you spend your free time. You may come across the feeling of guilt when you spend your time with your family or friends in your free time because you feel like you must attend to your partner. I took some time to talk to a fellow student about her toxic relationship and here is what she said, “A toxic relationship can be between two people who truly love each other very much but are just better off apart then they are together. For example in my situation, insecurities, self doubt, and jealousy, overtook my picture perfect relationship. Before I knew it, in every situation there was always a problem. I started to become very down on myself and would blame myself for all the wrong, when in reality I was being manipulated into thinking all of that.”  Now for the most important part. How do you get out of a toxic relationship? If you feel that you are in physical danger then feel free to contact the domestic violence hotline (1-800-799-7233). Now if it is a mental problem then you need to decide if you want to work the problem out. I also believe just simply walking away is the answer when you can’t work out the problem. So if you need to completely leave your partner then do it!